Real News Headlines

The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"- someone bright

These are actual newspaper headlines gathered from papers around the world.

1. Include your Children when Baking Cookies (yummie!)
   
2. Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers (police joins darth vader crew)
   
3. Enraged Cow Injures Farmer with Ax (go mr cow!that will teached you mr farmer)
   
4. Plane Too Close to Ground, Crash Probe Told (it had already crash, of course it was close to groud before hitting it)
   
5. Miners Refuse to Work After Death (ermm is he suppose work after he died??)
   
6. Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant (wasn't it suppose to be the other way around, the law system needs revision)
   
7. Stolen Painting Found by Tree (either 'tree' was a person's name or it the painting was hanging on the tree, but to be found by a tree??. It must be some rare intelligent bred tree)
   
8. Two Soviet Ships Collide, One Dies (tsk..tsk..poor ship)
   
9. Two Sisters Reunited after 18 Years in Checkout Counter (the irony)
   
10. Lung Cancer in Women Mushrooms (hmm...not very appetizing)

Calvin: People think it must be fun to be a super genius, but they don't realize how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world. Hobbes: Isn't the zipper on your pants supposed to be in the front? -Calvin and Hobbes